Dumb Drivers

[Group9]

Here are the basic rules for driving in Miami, whether you are in a SUV or not:

1. To find the correct speed limit, take the number on the sign and add 30 MPH.

2. Driving through red lights is okay up to five vehicles.

3. When at a stop light and the light turns green, count to three Mississippi before proceeding (see above rule).

4. Turn signals are only to be used to show that you would like to park in a certain parking place. All other use is prohibited.

5. When in the far left lane and realizing that you have passed your exit on the highway, it is okay to cut across all lanes of traffic at once to avoid having to go to the next interchange. Also, see rule 4 above.

6. If you can actually see the bumper of the car in front of you, you are too far away and should drive closer.

7. It is okay to pull out in front of someone if it is physically possible for them to stop by slamming on their brakes.

8. Driving three abreast on a three lane highway is okay because it looks more orderly and is good training for future fighter pilots who will need to fly in formation.

9. Don't bother to look at traffic signs. If they really had important information, they would be in Spanish and English.

10. Large white trucks with "Ambulance" and black and white cars with "Police" will attempt to take unfair advantage on the road by using flashing lights and sirens. Do not give in to these persons who do not want to wait their turn.

[cecilVA]

Lol, northern VA is the same way! How wierd is that. And I'll add one for my neighborhood:

Priority at a four way stop is determined individually by each driver by rules known only to them

[Jynkxxie]

Ha Ha Ha That was hillarious 9 .

[Dayna36]

Hi, i'm a typical SUV driver. Because i drive a super humongous vehicle, i will feel the need to tail you no farther then 2 yards. I will always speed excessively. If you get in my way, i'll just run you over, becuase my car is super humongous. What's that? It's raining and you don't want to go 10 over the speed limit? That's fine, i'll just tail you enough so you get so scared you'll spin out and hit something.

Bah, stupid SUV drivers, why must so many of them develop some sort of superiority complex because they drive such a huge vehicle. Or did they already have a superiority complex so they got a super humongous vehicle to reaffirm their superior awesomenss? Or maybe they have small penises?





Thats a pretty broad statement there even with your disclaimer.

Good quote except you forgot this part; Whenever it snows or gets icy, I see more SUVS stuck in ditches than any other type of vehicle.
I like to laugh at those poor buggers. :D

As for small penises, well that's hardly an issue since we all know, it ain't the meat, it's the motion.lol

[imalazypup]

Good quote except you forgot this part; Whenever it snows or gets icy, I see more SUVS stuck in ditches than any other type of vehicle.
I like to laugh at those poor buggers. :D

As for small penises, well that's hardly an issue since we all know, it ain't the meat, it's the motion.lol

That was my post? :confused:

[Dayna36]

Yes it was. I am quoting part of your post.

[imalazypup]

Yes it was. I am quoting part of your post.

It's 2:16am.

I'm tired