You know you've been in Law Enforcement too long when...

[Star]

You have the bladder capacity of five people.


Your idea of a good time is an armed robbery at shift change.


You call for a criminal background check on anyone who seems remotely friendly towards you.


You think everyone is automatically lying unless they can prove it to you.


Discussing dismemberment over a meal seems perfectly normal.


You believe in aerial spraying of Prozac.


You believe that "shallow gene pool" is sufficient grounds for arrest.


You believe the government should require background checks and permits prior to reproduction.


You believe that unspeakable evil will befall you if anyone says, "Boy, it's really quiet tonight."


Your diet consists of food that has gone through more processing than a computer can actually track.


You believe chocolate is a food group.


You believe that "too stupid to live" is a valid verdict.


You think caffeine should be available in I.V. form.


Your favorite hallucinogen is exhaustion.


When you mention "vegetables" you're not referring to the food group.


It occurs to you one night that you really have entered "The Twilight Zone."


You find out a lot about paranoia just by following people around.


You are told to deliver a human body part to the lab and you find youself talking to it in the car.


You are the only person introduced by profession at a social gathering.


You walk into places and people think it highly comical to seize a coworker and shout, "They've come to get you, Frank!"


People shout, "I didn't do it!" when you walk into a room in uniform and they think they are being hysterically funny AND original.

[Michelles]

:eek: Okay, now I am officially scared of LEO's!

But will still make a copy of this and take to the station, and never look at a LEO the same way again!

Thanx Star!

:-)

[seltzer]

So, uhhh, Star, you go around talking to body parts?!?!? :D

[Star]

So, uhhh, Star, you go around talking to body parts?!?!? :D

No, I never actually have but I remember one time walking through a morgue checking out wounds on a body that hadn't been prepped yet. My Sgt at the time tickled the guys feet thinking it would gross me out. After he said, "Tickle, tickle, tickle" the gasses in the body blurted out a nice, "Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" noise and he tried to make a new door to get out of the morgue. I grew up in a police family and had heard about this before so it didn't startle me but I almost peed in my pants and a joke that backfired on my Sgt. :D

Later, he told me it sounded as if me and all the dead folks were laughing at him from the outside. There's great acoustics in a morgue.

[Strijder]

I've heard of naming body parts, but talking to them??

[Michelles]

I've heard of naming body parts, but talking to them??

What do you mean by naming body parts :confused:
Or should I ask?

[Star]

What do you mean by naming body parts :confused:
Or should I ask?

Uh oh, Michelle, you opened up a can of "worms". :D tee hee! I can't wait to hear the rest of this.

[Coastie 585]

People shout, "I didn't do it!" when you walk into a room in uniform and they think they are being hysterically funny AND original.

...One of the main reasons I do not do this. :D

Very funny Star, thanks for the laugh.

[seltzer]

lol "Hey, it's my old buddy ****, where have you been hanging around? By the way, ****, you smell funny!"

[fancyglo]

Your family doesn't understand how you can sleep with the radio on turned up half way.
You try to make them undertand that you know what's important to listen for and can sleep throught the rest.

[Star]

...One of the main reasons I do not do this.
Very funny Star, thanks for the laugh.

Good for you. I have faith that you're a great Cadet. You will go very far. I'm "rooting" for ya! :D

[fetom]

I' have been in too long. It all makes perfect logical sense to me. OWe you a green one for this Star.

[fetom]

:eek: Okay, now I am officially scared of LEO's!:-)

Be scared............................ Be VERY scared................................... :eek:

[Coastie 585]

Okay, now I am officially scared of LEO's!

Youve been on the forums for over a month and you are JUST starting to fear them? :rolleyes:









:D

[Star]

I' have been in too long. It all makes perfect logical sense to me. OWe you a green one for this Star.

And I owe you another too!!!! You are awesome, Dave. A very nice addition to RP! Nice to have you here! Get your wifey on here, as well. ;)