Scared Straight Program Oregon?

[kimberlyseare]

Is there a scared straight program in Oregon? I have a 7 year old with some big issues and i need help. He just doesn't get it. He is starting fires, stealing, cheating, lying, always has the answer of "I don't know". He even says that someone tells him what to do? We don't know who he is talking about. He is in counseling and on meds for ADHD, but things are not working. He needs to see what his life is headed for if he continues with his actions.

[Citicop]

Moved to General Law Enforcement Topics as a more appropriate area.

Welcome to RP.

Keep in mind that I am neither a Juvenile Justice expert of any kind, nor am I a psychologist or medical doctor.

Having said that, I don't think a "scared straight" program is what you want for a 7 year old. He is too young to "see what his life is headed for if he continues with his actions." His brain simply isn't wired to see that connection yet, and the impact will be completely wasted.

Now, that does not mean you don't have a serious problem on your hands, just that the solution you asked about is less than ideal. If he is starting fires, lying, stealing, and telling you that "someone is telling him what to do," he may have a very serious psychological diagnosis in his future, and it's not the ADHD.

He needs a professional therapist, and a medical psychiatrist who specializes in children.

Out of a professional curiosity, does your son also wet the bed, or display cruel behavior toward animals or smaller children?

-Citicop.

[retdetsgt]

None that I know of. Besides, 7 years old is too young for something like that. Keep working with professionals with him. Maybe if the counselor you're seeing isn't helping, find another.

Good luck.

[Joeyd6]

Good family counselro and a hobby for him. My neighbor had a young kid who was going down the same road. They enrolled him karate classes and explained the situation to the training place. That kid was "fixed" pretty damn quick. The father to this day swears the kid was more fearful of instructor at the karate place than anything they could say.....to the point they would threaten to tell/call when he was misbehaving. After a year the kid was on track. Its 2 years later and the kid is polite, nice and involved with a few other things including cub scouts.

[S-99]

None that I know of. Besides, 7 years old is too young for something like that. Keep working with professionals with him. Maybe if the counselor you're seeing isn't helping, find another.

Good luck.

^^^ Yes. I'm not really qualified to speak other than as a parent. But, as a parent, if I were in your shoes I would read as many parenting books as I could find (like "1,2,3 Magic" and books that cover your son's issues), meet regularly with his teachers and school counselors to discuss what's happening with him at school (and how the school might assist with his issues), ask my child's doctor to recommend a highly qualified child psychiatrist, and personally advocate for my child until I got to the root of his issues. Because you mentioned "Scared Straight" and he's only seven, I think you also need to ask yourself if you personally are giving him enough love and caring attention (i.e., is this a play for attention, even if it's negative, because he's feeling overwhelmed at school or not getting enough unconditional love from you)? I don't mean that as a criticism, just trying to help you think through the possible reasons. Best of luck to you.

[retdetsgt]

I would really emphasize to you that counselors aren't "one size fits all" My youngest daughter had problems adjusting when I got custody of her and her sister. I took her to several before we found one she could connect with. I had the same problem years later when I needed therapy, it took me going to three or four before I found someone I was comfortable with. And don't be surprised if you and the rest of the family are required to get involved in counseling too. The dynamics often involve everyone.

I'm no psychologist either, but it's been my experience that when kids don't think they're getting enough attention, they'll do whatever to get it. And negative is better than none at all.