What is said....what is meant

[Star]

What is Said
What is Meant!

While on routine patrol...
I was in the car because the coffee shop was closed.

The motorist was operating his vehicle in a reckless manner
He had a bumper sticker that said "SLOW DOWN-DON'T FEED THE PIGS"

The accident scene and the safety of the victims prevented this officer from doing traffic control
It was raining.

This officer went out-of-service to obtain intelligence information from a street informant.
It was too hot to ride in the car.

I observed the suspect acting in a suspicious manner...
The dirt-bag let go with an "Oink" as I walked by.

Knowing the suspect had a criminal history...
He puked on my uniform one night...

The informant is of known credibility and has provided reliable information in the past...
I've got two theft cases hanging over his head...

While being arrested, this subject resisted being injured in the act...
He ripped my shirt and broke my new mirror sunglasses...

The motorist was cited for multiple traffic violations...
I wrote one citation for each swear-word he used...

Upon announcing my title and purpose, I heard a voice from inside the house say "Come in" so this writer entered through the door...
The rock music was so loud they wouldn't have heard Patton's army so I kicked in the door.

The members of the press at the scene were offered every courtesy within departmental policies...
I sent then to a nonexistent address which I called the "Command Post".

I gave the motorist a verbal warning for speeding...
She was a good-looking blonde who owned a liquor store and who was free after my shift was over.

The Chief appeared at the scene and took command...
I sent him to the same address as the reporters.

Further interview of the witness was impossible, due to conditions.
It was my bowling night...

The motorist eyes were glassy, he had slurred speech , was unsteady on his feet, and smelled strongly of an alcoholic beverage.
He was howling at the moon and trying to drive the car from the back seat.

Using only enough force to restrain the subject...
My favorite song is "Drop-kick me Jesus Through the Goal Post of Life"

The defendant asked this officer's advice on how to act before the judge at his arraignment...
I told him he didn't have the balls to call the judge the same name he called me.

[sbrad]

What is Said
What is Meant!

While on routine patrol...
I was in the car because the coffee shop was closed.

I like this one better:

While on routine patrol...
I watched him stagger out of the bar and drive off while I was hiding behind the restaurant across the street.

[Star]

I like this one better:

While on routine patrol...
I watched him stagger out of the bar and drive off while I was hiding behind the restaurant across the street.

Me too! :D I didn't like the coffee shop one either though I am guilty of sneaking off to Starbucks for a moca frappucino.

[K-9MALY]

I give off my voodoo man vibe to the lil chicky at Tim Hortons, and she hooks me up with an extra shot of the mocha!
She's powerless against the mojo baby!!! :cool:


(As I type, I scan my shoulder to look for the wife coming up on my six. She is the only one who knows that I have no game!! )

[Star]

I give off my voodoo man vibe to the lil chicky at Tim Hortons, and she hooks me up with an extra shot of the mocha!
She's powerless against the mojo baby!!! :cool:

I don't blame her at all. I'd just give you the whole cup free with my phone number written on the side. ;)

[graymatter]

I give off my voodoo man vibe to the lil chicky at Tim Hortons, and she hooks me up with an extra shot of the mocha!
She's powerless against the mojo baby!!!


(As I type, I scan my shoulder to look for the wife coming up on my six. She is the only one who knows that I have no game!! )

This is funny. Made my day reading this post. :D

[valycop]

Me too! :D I didn't like the coffee shop one either though I am guilty of sneaking off to Starbucks for a moca frappucino.

frappucino, frappucino!!!!!!!!????????? Oh pleeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaasssssssee!
Give me good old Navy/Marines Corp coffee any day; the kind you pour into your dead battery in the winter to jumpstart your car. The kind that looks more like pancake syrup and is guaranteed to keep you awake for three days straight. Now that's coffee! Frappucino.........sheeeeeeesh. :D

[MOCOP]

frappucino, frappucino!!!!!!!!????????? Oh pleeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaasssssssee!
Give me good old Navy/Marines Corp coffee any day; the kind you pour into your dead battery in the winter to jumpstart your car. The kind that looks more like pancake syrup and is guaranteed to keep you awake for three days straight. Now that's coffee! Frappucino.........sheeeeeeesh. :D

Exactly. It kills me to stop for coffee and the guy with me orders some Foo Foo thing like Frappuccino, Mocha Latte etc. etc..

Come on Junior if yer gonna drink coffee drink Coffee. :D

[jonesg11]

I give off my voodoo man vibe to the lil chicky at Tim Hortons, and she hooks me up with an extra shot of the mocha!
She's powerless against the mojo baby!!! :cool:


(As I type, I scan my shoulder to look for the wife coming up on my six. She is the only one who knows that I have no game!! )

So you know what Tim Hortons is?

[retdetsgt]

While on routine patrol...
I was in the car because the coffee shop was closed.

While on routine patrol...

I was awakened by a loud crash

[Star]

frappucino, frappucino!!!!!!!!????????? Oh pleeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaasssssssee!
Give me good old Navy/Marines Corp coffee any day; the kind you pour into your dead battery in the winter to jumpstart your car. The kind that looks more like pancake syrup and is guaranteed to keep you awake for three days straight. Now that's coffee! Frappucino.........sheeeeeeesh. :D

Alright now, Gomer. :D When we meet up, I am going to buy you one and see if you don't get hooked on it too.

[christrue]

I too do enjoy Frappucino.



If I need stronger coffee I'll have to research it...

[chris2001]

I don't blame her at all. I'd just give you the whole cup free with my phone number written on the side. ;)

Come out to KS and you can give me that number :D

and who needs a coffee when there is Dr. Pepper

[Star]

Come out to KS and you can give me that number :D

and who needs a coffee when there is Dr. Pepper

Dr. Pepper and ice cream and you got it!

[chris2001]

Dr. Pepper and ice cream and you got it!

Sweet the guys on the force will be jealous an outing with a hot chief of police. Dang I am gonna have stories to tell :D

Hows the Avy coming?