Visiting someone in jail...

[massgrunt]

I have an old friend from way back, my best friend for years when we were kids, who is a total f'up and is now in jail. We were very tight years ago, still are although we have nothing in common, I grew up and he didn't, I joined the Marines and he went steadily down hill. We were back in touch for a while, then when I was away he got arrested on warrants for some stuff I wasn't aware of. He is a felon, and is looking at years behind bars, basically because he's stupid. He was doing very well, showing real character, and then got popped for some minor stuff that snowballed because of his terrible judgement.

Now, spare me the advice on being friends with this type of guy, because I already know you're right. But this is a guy who's never done me wrong, has been a hell of a friend, and doesn't attempt to be a bad influence, not that it would be possible anyway. I don't intend to turn my back on him, because he needs a friend, and I don't abandon people when they're in trouble. I know he'd be there for me. Not only that, but I wonder how I'd have turned out if I'd been cursed with his parents.

That's a long winded lead up to this question: I'd like to go visit him in jail, moral support and all that. He's going to be there for quite a while, and will not be getting many visitors. But I assume that when you visit someone in jail, you get run through NCIC for warrants, birds of a feather and all. I also assume that there's a record kept when you get run, and I don't want that coming up in a BI. For obvious reasons. Am I correct in that assumption? If I call the jail and say "I want to visit a prisoner, but I don't want you to run my name through the system", I would imagine they'd laugh their asses off.

Any advice?

[greenlead]

There is no reason to fear being run through the system.

[massgrunt]

Well, I suppose it's being shady, but I don't want to be associated with him. I assume it's an up-hill battle to prove that your 15 year friendship with a felon (assault and gun charges, drugs, etc) is perfectly innocent.

I guess the obvious answer is just to write a letter or something, but I'm kind of musing on this.

[Nuklhed]

Well, I suppose it's being shady, but I don't want to be associated with him. I assume it's an up-hill battle to prove that your 15 year friendship with a felon (assault and gun charges, drugs, etc) is perfectly innocent.

I guess the obvious answer is just to write a letter or something, but I'm kind of musing on this.

Keep in mind, some agencies (Maybe most) have a policy about associating with known felons. I realize he is your buddy, but sometimes you have to make sacrafices (Oh, heck I rewrote that word 5 times, I cant spell it).

Just something to think about.

[Wifeofadeputy]

You know, from a NON LEO perspective, I dont see anything at all wrong with just telling the story like you have told it here. This is someone who you were friends with as a kid... who screwed up while you were away... is now "paying his debt to society" and you want to be helpful and encouraging. Are you in the process now? Do you have a BI? If I were you, Id just call and explain the situation, and ask. Cant hurt!

[Switchback]

FYI, policy prohibits me associating with felons that are not family members. You can't pick your family, and all. Of course, I am already on the job.

[George]

If this guy were my friend and all the stuff you posted, I would visit him no matter what the outcome was. Jobs are easy to come by nowadays, but true friends arn't.

[Rad Diver]

Massgrunt,

If you are considering or in le then let him be. Above post are correct, no associations with know felons or unsavory characters, not to include family, outside the job of course.

If you not in LE and your not gonna be, then go see him.

Hope this helps!

[massgrunt]

[QUOTE=Nuklhed]Keep in mind, some agencies (Maybe most) have a policy about associating with known felons. QUOTE]That's exactly what I had in mind. I am making a conscious decision to keep associating with him, you know? And he has an awful record. Well, no way am I letting his dumb *** affect my future, but I would prefer to stay friends for several reasons.

This is what he did: Got nailed for assault with a weapon (beer bottle) after defending his younger brother from several guys in a bar fight. His brother was underage, shouldn't have been there in the first place. Officer working a detail tells him to beat it, then arrests him when he returns to get his jacket.

Doesn't get a lawyer. Gets 13 months for something a lawyer could have talked him out of, considering the circumstances. Does two months, out for good behaviour.

Moves to another state while meeting probation requirements (I think). Gets evicted. Doesn't remove his stuff from the place. Landlord finds a gun. Whoops, he's a felon. Warrant issued. At this point he decides the smart move is to stop going to his probabtion officer. Apparently, he thinks it's just that simple.

Fast forward like, a year. Living with a total loser girl. She is one day screaming at her kids so loud the neighbors call the cops. Cops show up, arrest my buddy. Serving rest of original sentence, facing 5 years per charge in another state. Well and truly f'd.

I guess this is turning into venting about how my friend with so much potential ran himself right into the ground. I'm a little shaky on some of the details, 90% of this happened while I was far away from home, and he wasn't exactly upfront about it with me. For good reason.

[Wifeofadeputy]

*chuckles* And THAT is why I always preface anything I post like this with "my NON LEO opinion"

[massgrunt]

Massgrunt,

If you are considering or in le then let him be. Above post are correct, no associations with know felons or unsavory characters, not to include family, outside the job of course.

If you not in LE and your not gonna be, then go see him.

Hope this helps!

I'm not in law enforcement, but am really interested in nothing else for the future.

If this guy were my friend and all the stuff you posted, I would visit him no matter what the outcome was. Jobs are easy to come by nowadays, but true friends arn't.

Uh, sure thing pal. I appreciate the reply, but he will not be paying my bills nor giving me a challenging and interesting future.

[George]

We see friends different I guess. I know I would drop a job for a friend any day. I would give a friend the shirt off my back and the shoes off my feet. And there are other jobs that can pay your bills and can give you a challegning and interesting future. Law enforcement is not the only job like that in the world.

But you're a grown man/woman and can make your own decisions. So do what you think is best.

[massgrunt]

But you're a grown man/woman

What are you insinuating!? Just kidding. Well, loyalty is a precious thing, but keep in mind he brought this all on himself, and me not being a cop isn't going to help him a damn bit.

[George]

I guess maybe because it was I never really had any friends through in my younger years, that I give the term friend such a high standard. I know he bought it all on himself, but since he maybe goin to prison, it may clean him up some and with the proper support, it could happen and could turn his life around. But I'm just giving my opinion(view) on the topic. I mean no personal attacks with my posts or anything to that matter. Hope you can understand.

[massgrunt]

I guess maybe because it was I never really had any friends through in my younger years, that I give the term friend such a high standard. I know he bought it all on himself, but since he maybe goin to prison, it may clean him up some and with the proper support, it could happen and could turn his life around. But I'm just giving my opinion(view) on the topic. I mean no personal attacks with my posts or anything to that matter. Hope you can understand.

Well, if I didn't want opinions, I wouldn't ask. Btw, according to your profile, you're 12 years old. Is that accurate?