can my dad get in trouble for this?

[Dr4g0n]

Not sure any of us can give you solid advice, but only small parts of our own experiences or wisdom.

My father was also in LE. I doubt very seriously that the issues I dealt with growing up are anywhere in comparison to what you are going through.

I do know that you cannot fix "his" problems. All you can do is be a good son and be there for him if he needs you.

When I was 16 I pocketed some money to take my dad to a ball game. Seemed to cheer him up quite a bit.

Good luck,

Let us know..

Thanx I'll try to do things to cheer him up a bit but right now I don't think I'll be able to cause he just wants to be left alone. I live with him but I'm old enough to do my own thing so I can stay out of his way but my siblings live with our mom and stepfather and when they come for a visit you can't tell a 7 or 10yearold not to talk to there dad so it's much harder for them. Now my mom knows what happened with the tape and the hitting and yelling so my brother and sister won't be visiting anymore at least for a while I guess. My mom wants me to come live with her but I have all my friends and school here so I'll just avoid my dad at home unless he talks to me first.

[Dr4g0n]

You have to remember your the kid and it's not your job to fix the problem. If your dad wanted you to know what was going on he would have told you. His partner knows that your dad doesn't want you to know, and it's not his place to explain everything to you. You did what was right now let the partner take care of it, there is nothing else for you to do.

OK sir. I just wish I could do something

[Dr4g0n]

now my dad's making me choose between moving to my moms who lives 4 hours away or staying here with his partner's family "until further notice" which is what he always says when he grounds me and doesnt know for how long so I think he's just punishing me for ratting him out. I promised I wouldn't make any noise or bother him at all but he doesn't care. Can he really force me to leave? I'm 16 and I've lived with him for like 3 years and I thought at 12 you can decide which parent you want to live with??

[Sierra]

now my dad's making me choose between moving to my moms who lives 4 hours away or staying here with his partner's family "until further notice"

Can he really force me to leave? I'm 16 and I've lived with him for like 3 years and I thought at 12 you can decide which parent you want to live with??

Have you considered the fact that perhaps he is recognizing the fact that he may be posing a danger to you with his actions or that he is trying the best he can to deal with the situation? He has given you the chance to stay with the partner's family, so it isn't like he is trying to dump you off on the mom.

Yes, he can force you to leave. This isn't where you can force yourself upon someone. Give him the chance to work it out. Talk to the partner again and see if that would help.

[Sgt. Slaughter]

Unless there's a court order, your parents decide for you until you're 18.

[Dr4g0n]

Have you considered the fact that perhaps he is recognizing the fact that he may be posing a danger to you with his actions or that he is trying the best he can to deal with the situation? He has given you the chance to stay with the partner's family, so it isn't like he is trying to dump you off on the mom.

Yes, he can force you to leave. This isn't where you can force yourself upon someone. Give him the chance to work it out. Talk to the partner again and see if that would help.

Yeah maybe he's trying to do what he thinks is best but I figure I can just stay out of his way and it shouldn't be a problem but I guess not. I like his partner and he is fair and all but he's really really strict and I'll be miserable I mean my dad is pretty strict or at least used to be before he stopped caring about stuff but he was kinda easygoing compared to his partner so I'm kinda scared.

[Dr4g0n]

Unless there's a court order, your parents decide for you until you're 18.

When my parents divorced about 3 years ago the judge let me decide if I wanted to stay with my dad or mom because I was old enough to decide but he made the decision for my younger siblings. I wanted to stay witgh my dad cause my mom cheated on him and I didn't want to live with her and the other guy so my dad has custody of me and my mom of my siblings and they each have visitation so how can he just make me leave? I don't get it.

[Sgt. Slaughter]

Your Dad is responsible for you. If he feels you're better off elsewhere, that's his decision to make.

FYI - the judge asked your opinion on whom you wanted to live with, but he made the ultimate legal decision. See the difference?

[Dr4g0n]

Your Dad is responsible for you. If he feels you're better off elsewhere, that's his decision to make.

FYI - the judge asked your opinion on whom you wanted to live with, but he made the ultimate legal decision. See the difference?

Your right Sir he asked me what I wanted but in the end it was the judge's decision which is why it's weird my dad can just kick me out now after the judge gave him custody. Anyway I'm moving tomorrow cause my dad's partner is getting fed up with me wanting to stay here so he said I can move in with them this weekend or otherwise he'll just take me to my mom's on sunday whether I like it or not and I don't want to piss him off. Nobody cares what I think but I think it's stupid to have my dad be by himself cause then nobody will even know what's going on with him but oh well I'm just a dumb kid...

[Sgt. Slaughter]

I don't think you're dumb. Unfortunately, you just don't know what's going on. Quite possibly, no one else really does either - maybe that includes your Dad, too. Maybe that scares the crap out of him and he thinks it's better that you're somewhere else until he can get things sorted out.

Either way, you're just gonna have to roll with it and make the best of things. Tell your Dad you love him and you want to help him any way you can. Call him, email him, text him, write him letters with pen and paper. Also, if you believe, pray for him. It really is the best you can do for him.

Not everything in this life can always be "fixed" by others. Some stuff people have to conquer on their own.

Good luck to you and your Dad.