Female cops-what do you think?

[1girlcop]

I'm on my way to becoming a police officer. I'm currently going through the process and I've already finished half of the requirements. I'm in my 20's and married. I know without a doubt this is my calling, but my husband is worried that I'll be heckled by my male co-workers. I'm not "butch" by any means and I'm very feminine. I get hit on often. My husbands co-workers have told him that I'm "hot" and I think this is feeding into his insecurity that If I'm out there on the job with an almost all male police force, that I'll leave him. I've also read that there is a high divorce rate with police officers. How do other officers deal with this? Do the male officers wives respond well to female police officers?
Any opinions? I love my husband but know his insecurities might lead to trouble down the road. I want this job desperately.

[Kimble]

A good cop is a good cop, just as a good worker (be he/she a banker, a cop, a garbage collector, or whatever) is a good worker. Sex is immaterial.

Sure, there can be physical limitations with some smaller people, but even that isn't a sex-exclusive characteristic.

[Taz_bb2]

I don't care if you are male or female, just that you'll have my back when the S$$t hits the fan. I care that you will hold your own on your calls instead of calling for backup every time. (Sometimes its needed, but not on EVERY call.:mad I care that you will take the time and pride to do the job right with professionalism and integrity.

All these are issues that have nothing to do with gender, but with character. You have that...you're golden in my book. :cool:

As to your husband's insecurity...you might get hit on, but its no different than now. He will have to deal with it and you will have to constantly reassure him where your fidelity lies.

[kazz]

I don't care if you are male or female, just that you'll have my back when the S$$t hits the fan. I care that you will hold your own on your calls instead of calling for backup every time. (Sometimes its needed, but not on EVERY call.:mad I care that you will take the time and pride to do the job right with professionalism and integrity.

All these are issues that have nothing to do with gender, but with character. You have that...you're golden in my book. :cool:

As to your husband's insecurity...you might get hit on, but its no different than now. He will have to deal with it and you will have to constantly reassure him where your fidelity lies.

Well said mate. . . .

1girlcop, if you worked elsewhere, isn't the fact good looking guys can speak to you and hit on you any way???? My wife gets hit on all the time by salesmen at the Pet shop she manages, it just something I have no control over and I trust my wife. But then we've been married a year or 20!! :p

Maybe you 2 need to have a quiet chat and resolve those issues, his insecurity might have nothing to do with you becoming a LEO.

In any case, good luck on following your dream and head the wise words of ROS & Taz_bb2.

[bluelightzgrl]

I love my husband but know his insecurities might lead to trouble down the road.

Well Maybe you 2 need to have a quiet chat and resolve those issues, his insecurity might have nothing to do with you becoming a LEO.

Like kazz already said, except I'd drop the "maybe". I speak from experience in this exact area. For me it was nothing but trouble with my now ex-husband. I got tired of the accusations and that lead to nothing but fighting. No good. Sit down, talk with dear hubby now.

I've also read that there is a high divorce rate with police officers. How do other officers deal with this? Do the male officers wives respond well to female police officers?

I'd say this depends on who you talk to. I worked with a male officer that got married for the 3rd time at 27. Another one started his 3rd marriage at 34(ish?). Where as I know several who have been happily married for years. Marriage is work, but it takes both parties wanting to work at it.



But like the others said, best of luck to you! :D

[Badgerboy]

You might want to hash this out now as others have said. It CAN be a hurdle for many couples (both LE/LE and LE/non.)

Also, you might want to change your username until you get that shield. ;)

[Mike Romeo]

I have served with women AND men that probably should not be police officers, but .................

[Mike Romeo]

As long as she or he can carry or pull me to safety if I'm injured, it's all good.

[Samuel]

Are you asking the female cops on RP what they think of your situation or are you asking everyone what they think of female cops? :confused:

[1girlcop]

I'm sorry to those who misunderstood the question. I want both men and women to answer this question of mine. I want to know a few things...
1.) Do men mind working with female co-workers (assuming they can, of course, hold their ground)?
2.) How are the male officers wives with the concept of their husbands spending time (on duty, not off) with female officers?
3.) Are attractive female officers typically given a more difficult time by the public or other officers?
Sorry for all the questions. The department I'll be working for is approx 92% male and I would like to feel "welcome" working beside them and not a "burden". I'm sure I'll just have to prove myself like everyone else.
I'm sure there's also a no-dating policy between co-workers at most police agencies, right? This is what I've heard but it's not confirmed.

[ngcsubutterbar]

To be honest. I've seen this first hand. Unless you and your husband are secure with each other, there is a decent chance he will have 'cause' to worry about what you and your future coworkers do together. Don't take it personally, I don't know you but it's happened more times than people want to know.




There may or may not be 'no dating policies' but in general some people/police are rabbits when it comes down to it.

[Cat_Doc]

As mentioned, your sex has nothing to do with how well you can do the job. I have worked with female officers I trusted my life with. I worked with male officers that I wanted to knock out first before the crap hit the fan so they would not be in my way.

As far as the hitting upon, it is no different than any other line of work, with the exception of intensity and danger causing a bond that is very elite. If you truly love your husband and visa versa…and you two have an avenue of open communication, you should be just fine. I know it sounds like a standard script, but talking and understanding, a little give and take, with earned trust is the key to any good relationship, be it an accountant, plumber or cop.

You will have some of these young bucks hitting on you, no doubt, but your reaction to it will cause the word to spread…off limits.

Remember, it takes two to tangle, but only one to stop it.

[Cat_Doc]

I'm sure there's also a no-dating policy between co-workers at most police agencies, right?

You don't need no stinking department policy if you are faithful to your mate. You brought your own core values with you or you left them at the living room door.

[Plazoo]

1.) Do men mind working with female co-workers (assuming they can, of course, hold their ground)?
2.) How are the male officers wives with the concept of their husbands spending time (on duty, not off) with female officers?
3.) Are attractive female officers typically given a more difficult time by the public or other officers?

1. I don't care what an officer's sex is as long as they know what they're doing and can hold their own weight. In fact, at the department I'm at now, I know a couple male officers I wouldn't want responding even if I was lying on the ground bleeding to death while there's a female officer I would more than welcome on any call I'm at.

2. I can't speak for everyone, but my wife (we've been together for 14 years), is comfortable with the fact that I work alongside woman, several of them very attractive ones. She knows I won't cheat on her and that knowledge is good enough for her.

3. Male or female, it's going to seem like you're getting a 'difficult' time by your fellow workers until you've proven yourself to them. As far as getting hit on, well, it's part of the gig. You're going to have citizens hitting on you and you're going to have dirtbags challenging you because you're attractive and simply because your a cop. It's part of the job but how you choose to handle it will determine how things work out for you in the long run.

The main concern I see you having is with your husband's insecurities. Unlike a banker's job, you dont get off at a set time where you can be expected to be home at X o'clock. There are going to be numerous times where it'll be five minutes before end of shift and the sh!t hits the fan and you have to work over a few extra hours. If your husband's head is already spinning, I can see that causing him to simply meltdown with imagined visions of affairs etc.

Like mentioned, I would sit down and have a SERIOUS discussion with him and do whatever it takes in order for him to work past his petty jealousies or I could see some serious problems down the road.

[Cat_Doc]

2. I can't speak for everyone, but my wife (we've been together for 14 years), is comfortable with the fact that I work alongside woman, several of them very attractive ones. She knows I won't cheat on her and that knowledge is good enough for her.

My wife and I have been together for the past 32 years. We have our minor ups and downs, usually over little stupid things (like my big mouth) and probably still will, but the bottom line is trust.

I told her about a cute young (drunk) girlie-whirlie that came up to me after a large fight at a wedding party we had to break up. The girl told me I was "hot" and had a nice ***. When I told my wife about it, she said, "She must have been very, very, very drunk." So much for the ego boost.

The point is, I was not afraid to come home and tell her about it. And...I would much rather she already knew about it from me than to have one of the other squad members mention it at a social event; since I got teased pretty bad in the first place by the younger deputies who witnessed this. (They wanted to know how much I paid her to swoon over me. :mad