Scaring the boyfriend - how far is too far?

[sera_michele]

Hi!

Every dad likes to scare the daughter's boyfriend a bit. My father joked about answering the door with his shotgun to the boys that wanted to date me. Of course he never did, but I can completely understand a father wanting to protect their daughter, keep her safe. My question is, can it go too far?

What if a father plans to take the boy, which is a minor, for a drive in the woods (until the boy is sufficiently lost), and pat him down and search his belongings before returning him?

Could this be considered harassment, even criminal?

Thanks in advance for your thoughts!

[ngcsubutterbar]

Ever watch Bad Boys II? Yeah If I ever had a daughter, that's what I'd do. :D

[chris2001]

Yes it can go to far

It would be an illegal search and seizure as well as kidnapping.

Well if its a violation of the fourth amendment and the kid (you said minor) was taken and did not want to go. Then you bet its criminal, and the father will probably get sued as well.

[ChesCopPodz]

It's not a violation of the fourth amendment. The father is not the government. The constitutional rights only apply to government actions.

If the boy willingly went with the father then it's not kidnapping. The only thing it really could be (besides really creepy) is possibly assault if the boy did not consent to the father searching him because (at least here) assault and battery is any unwanted touching not of a sexual nature.

[sera_michele]

What if the man in question is a LEO (well, a prision guard, but that's law enforcement, right?)

[Old Trooper]

I always made sure that any boy who dated one of my daughters got a chance to meet me in uniform....usually, that was enough to pass along a message.

[Bearcat06]

Tell your boyfriend to be a man and talk to your Dad so that they are on the same sheet of music when it comes to you......

[Cat_Doc]

Tell your boyfriend to be a man and talk to your Dad so that they are on the same sheet of music when it comes to you......

Yep, Bear, that's probably why the dad is telling her this stuff, knowing she will tell the boyfriend.

What ever happened to the days when they walked in, shook your hand, sat down at the kitchen table, told you who their people were and got the man to boy talk from dad?

[txinvestigator1]

An oldie, but a goodie.

All my daughters dates will have this explained;

10 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter

Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, In order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four: I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five: In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early"

Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make
you cry.

Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter:
Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool.
Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight.
Places where there is darkness.
Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness.
Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat.
Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chainsaws are okay.
Hockey games are okay.
Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy outside of Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car-there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

[sera_michele]

I'm married folks.

[KatieMH21]

Yep, Bear, that's probably why the dad is telling her this stuff, knowing she will tell the boyfriend.

What ever happened to the days when they walked in, shook your hand, sat down at the kitchen table, told you who their people were and got the man to boy talk from dad?

Off the subject a bit... but Doc, I had a guy talk to my parents and ask them for their permission to "court me with intentions of marriage." My mom told the guy "You're serious? Good luck! She's going to tear you apart and leave you crying." :shuffle:

[Bearcat06]

What ever happened to the days when they walked in, shook your hand, sat down at the kitchen table, told you who their people were and got the man to boy talk from dad?

I did that with my last ex......We had date for about 6 months and we went over to her parents house. Dad and I grabbed a Budweiser and went outside and talked for about 30 mins.....
Found out Dad was a retired Army SGM and retired GS-15.....and liked that fact his daughter was finally dating someone decent.....a College Educated Army Vet that works for the Gov and doesn't live off the Gov....

That's why they still love me. :D

[sera_michele]

Like I said, I'm married and well past the age when my father intimidated my boyfriends. This info I am getting came from a man who posted his plans on a forum elsewhere (his daughter has a dance or something coming up, first dance probably =P), and I thought that he may be going a bit too far, and possibly getting himself in trouble. I just thought I would get a law officer's opinion on the matter. Thanks guys!

[Big Sexy]

My mom told the guy "You're serious? Good luck! She's going to tear you apart and leave you crying."

:eek:Should Big be nervous? :eek:

[Bearcat06]

Should Big be nervous? :eek:

I would be..... :D