Police Officer Preparation & Law Enforcement Resource - Archive

New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing @ss-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some @sshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-b!tch.

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them.

HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!! You think MEN have attitudes??

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!

New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing @ss-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some @sshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-b!tch.

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them.

HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!! You think MEN have attitudes??

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!

LMFAO, ROFL, TOO FUNNY, HILARIOUS, I'M- WETTING- MY- PANTS FUNNY because it's not only hilarious but true.... OMG, that was funny. In fact I was reading it for its truthfulness and was wondering why you'd left out cranky women, LOL.....but it made it in there right at the end, LMAO. Geeze, I'm gonna have to find the rep button somewhere around here.

In my best respectful but condescending tone used only for old people.
Well isn't that the truth. Let's just get you moved over to the recliner and make sure we take our meds this morning. Geritol and ex-Lax for starters. Here's some prune juice. And your favorite blanket! Don't you worry about that remote control, I'll be putting on Matlock in a minute. :biggrin5::biggrinjester:


But if your like my dad who is 70 and worked construction his whole life, it's more like the other day when we were putting up a playset for his grandkids when they visit. After putting up the platform, he climbs onto it to screw some things down. He drops a few screws. Then just says "F**ck!!!" , and a little startled at language, tone and frustration in his voice I ask what's the matter. He just says matter-of-factly "I'm old. It sucks." and finishes building the playset. His mother just turned 95 so I told him he has a long way to go before he can start complaining about being old. Plus hearing him yell like that reminded me he's the same fiery person that when I was being a mouthy 16 y/o, picked me up by the neck and pinned me to wall and asked "you think you're ready?" Answer is still 'no.'

When my Dad was in his 70's, he could still pick up a hundred pound sack of cotton seed or feed like it was a bag of groceries.

I went to see Joe Louis referee a pro wrestling match when he was in his 50's. One of the young wrestlers pushed Joe and out of reflex, Joe hit him right in the face. This kid, who was quite a bit bigger than Joe had blood fly from his face and he hit the mat out cold. There was nothing fake or contrived about it, they brought in EMT's to carry the guy out. I read in the paper the next day and Joe said, "I ain't as fast as I used to be, but I can hit just as hard as I ever could". No doubt about that.

Several years ago, my wife's family was doing a drug intervention on her niece when the young woman's ex-con, drug dealer boy friend showed up in front of the house. I went outside and was standing in the street daring him to get out of his car so I could stomp him into a mud puddle. He didn't, he left. Afterwards, it dawned on me that I was 58 years old, but I thought I was 30 standing in a tavern parking lot again. The intervention worked btw. And I still think I could have taken the sumbitch.:skep: I think he did too. I've not always been the best, but I never lacked confidence!

Now I have to deal with the lung damage I got working drug labs, but I still try.

I agree with you, seriously. I hire retired guys as often as possible, usually in their 40's.

I get really sick of babysitting.

Send a bunch very intelligent, older men to handle these people. I am far meaner, and smarter than I was when I was 18. Plus we have lived our lives had our fun, and these kids are just starting and getting killed.

News Alert: A 65 year old Army PFC was killed in battle today after slaughtering 42 terrorist rebels. His commanding officer a 26 year old Major said of this soldier. We are going to have to send his body to a plastic surgeon to wipe the damn smile off his face.

"You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to retdetsgt again."

In trying to rep you, for the record, I nearly [accidentally] reported your post. In any case, that's too hilarious...and I can see there's a lot of truth in what you said. :P

Send a bunch very intelligent, older men to handle these people. I am far meaner, and smarter than I was when I was 18. Plus we have lived our lives had our fun, and these kids are just starting and getting killed.


I remember a few years before I retired, another cop about my age were on the elevator at work and two young cops got on. They'd made an arrest and got about 1/2 oz of coke and were just peeing all over themselves. I think I might have raised an eyebrow or something at one who was acting like he was the only stalwart against crime in the city and he gave me a scowl. When they got off, I told the other old cop, "We are now the very people we used to hold in contempt." The kid didn't know about the kilos of cocaine my friend and I used to seize just a few years before. He thought he was something else.

Besides, young males between about 15 or 16 up to their mid to late 20's have this primal thing that prevents them from visualizing getting killed. That's why they make good warriors. Us old guys are more reluctant to do something obviously suicidal w/o very good reason.

But the old guys (18 yrs+) taught me how to talk to people and solve problems verbally. One old Indian cop I worked with could talk an outlaw biker out of his colors, I swear.

News Alert: A 65 year old Army PFC was killed in battle today after slaughtering 42 terrorist rebels. His commanding officer a 26 year old Major said of this soldier. We are going to have to send his body to a plastic surgeon to wipe the damn smile off his face.

AAAA-MEN to that one!

LIn fact I was reading it for its truthfulness and was wondering why you'd left out cranky women, LOL


http://i290.photobucket.com/albums/ll268/jimbellah/celebrity-pictures-angelina-jolie-p.jpg

http://i290.photobucket.com/albums/ll268/jimbellah/celebrity-pictures-angelina-jolie-p.jpg

Yeah, that's my girl, AngeLINA. She came to Iraq when I was there in 2008 and I was impressed as hell. No fanfare (except for her protection), no makeup, just as humble as can be. They set up a lunch meeting with her and a bunch of Marines in the Green Zone and she was just as down to earth as she could be. She might be closer to being a Republican like her old man then you'd think. I saw in an interview in 2008 that she was thinkin of voting for McCain. She might be a little wacky but she walks the walk and works tirelessly for refugees. No dummy, that girl.