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Doula357
08-31-09, 02:18 PM
Good morning,

I don't know if you can help me or not, but I don't know who else to ask. My husband and I have been separated for over a year and have verbally agreed on a visitation schedule for our two year old daughter. He lives (unofficially) with his girlfriend in Willits and I don't know the address.

The problem: According to our agreement, he is supposed to return the child to me this evening (Monday) after I get off of work. Yesterday, I asked him what time he expected to be here and he said he decided not to return her until Tuesday. There is no custody order in place and he hasn't responded to anymore of my messages. I know he wants more custody of her and he uses drugs quite often. I don't know what kind of legal recourse I have, but I am waiting to be placed with an attorney through Sonoma Legal Services. He's being very arogant about the whole thing and I'm afraid he's going to do this again and try to muscle his way into more time with her by deliberately keeping her from me. He and his girlfriend drink a lot a and get stonned on marijuana more than once a day... and there's another small child in the house that belongs to her.

Is our verbal agreement of every other weekend Friday through Monday binding? Is he committing a crime by refusing to return her and cutting off communication? Is there anything I can do about it, or just hope that he comes through tomorrow? Is this basis for some sort of restraining order that can be used until a custody order can be established? Can you help me understand the law in this type of situation?

Thank you for anything you can do,
Angela


janego10
08-31-09, 02:27 PM
It seems that you're in California, but if its the same as Texas if there is no custody paperwork signed by a judge then we cannot do a darn thing. If he decides not to bring the child back to you we cant take the child from him becuase he's the father. Same thing goes for you if you decide not to let him see the child. Until there is paperwork signed by a judge, then we can go with Interference with Child Custody and even thats a gray area with us when it comes to arrests, etc. You need to find a lawyer and get to court as fast as you can to get the visitation rights on paper. And if you believe he is doing drugs, etc. while your child is there call CPS.

Samuel
08-31-09, 06:42 PM
Good morning,

I don't know if you can help me or not, but I don't know who else to ask. My husband and I have been separated for over a year and have verbally agreed on a visitation schedule for our two year old daughter. He lives (unofficially) with his girlfriend in Willits and I don't know the address.

The problem: According to our agreement, he is supposed to return the child to me this evening (Monday) after I get off of work. Yesterday, I asked him what time he expected to be here and he said he decided not to return her until Tuesday. There is no custody order in place and he hasn't responded to anymore of my messages. I know he wants more custody of her and he uses drugs quite often. I don't know what kind of legal recourse I have, but I am waiting to be placed with an attorney through Sonoma Legal Services. He's being very arogant about the whole thing and I'm afraid he's going to do this again and try to muscle his way into more time with her by deliberately keeping her from me. He and his girlfriend drink a lot a and get stonned on marijuana more than once a day... and there's another small child in the house that belongs to her.

Is our verbal agreement of every other weekend Friday through Monday binding? Is he committing a crime by refusing to return her and cutting off communication? Is there anything I can do about it, or just hope that he comes through tomorrow? Is this basis for some sort of restraining order that can be used until a custody order can be established? Can you help me understand the law in this type of situation?

Thank you for anything you can do,
Angela

All the underlined BS should have been addressed a LONG time ago. :rolleyes:

Call the department of child/family services, a family law lawyer, and go to court.


Doula357
08-31-09, 06:53 PM
Samuel: Thank you for taking the time to reply. I never expected him to do this sort of thing. I don't have the address because they just moved three weeks ago and he hasn't told me. One of the biggest reasons we split was the marijuana, but he says that he will use one of those products that will make a drug test look clean, so I'm waiting for the courts to demand one from him. His plan (as he puts it) is to make me look crazy for suggesting it. I've printed recent pictures that he's posted to myspace with bongs and weed in the background and he's made it clear that he will not stop smoking when our daughter is with him. I'm in the process of being placed with a low-cost attorney because I can't afford the retainer of a lawyer charging full-price. We are very ready to file for divorce now, but there were obsticles in the way until recently.

Janego10: Thank you very much for the USEFUL information :)

Piggy
08-31-09, 08:51 PM
I don't know about California, but I would charge you with child endangerment. Why would you allow your child, without a court order, to go to a house where you know drugs are being used? It's one thing if the court ordered you to do it. In this case, you are voluntarily allowing your child to go there.