Police Officer Preparation & Law Enforcement Resource - Archive

My boyfriend is starting the Orange county sheriffs department academy in August. I am very proud of him and beyond excited as this is his life long dream. And truly the only profession he would want to do. However without trying to sound like a selfish brat. I am so scared at what the academy and this career in general will do to our relationship. I love him very much and we have been through more than your average couple. (he stood by me while I fought and beat cervical cancer) but this will be the first time he will have a whole new life that doesn't include me at all. I'm scared of the "badge Bunnies" everyone keeps referring to and even though he is extremely loyal and honest. And I know has not cheated. Men are men and it scares me to death. I'm scared he will change an wont be the man I love so much. Any advice at all will help me so much. He tells me that he wouldn't dream of going anywhere and this is happening ultimately for him but For US. So we can finally move in together get engaged and married. And start our lives together. Thank you so much for listening to my ramble. :)

-Britt

Britt, welcome to RP.

Some years ago I had a concerned wife ask me similar questions, her husband had recently graduated and was starting to work part time with us, she was concerned about many of the same things you are. Her husband wasn't the type before he started and he was the same guy when he actually started to work.

I guess the point I'm trying to make is if he is not fooling around on you now, you shouldn't be concerned about it after he starts his career...

Well first off congrats on beating cancer, you sound like a strong person.

With that said you sound easily strong enough to weather this little hiccup, it's not as bad as people make it out to be. Just realize there will be road bumps and that if you really love him you'll stick it out.

Good luck.

Read "I love a Cop" and both of you need to read "Emotional Survival for Law Enforcement."

Read "I love a Cop" and both of you need to read "Emotional Survival for Law Enforcement."

Ditto, EVEN after YEARS of marriage and being a LEO for all of those years it definately helps if the "other half" has a better understanding of the "job" related stress etc.

Also as stated above, if he is honest and faithful now, having a BADGE should not change this.

Maybe it's because I work for small towns or maybe it's because I'm ugly, but I don't find there is a high amount of badge bunnies in general around here. There are alot of "firehouse whores" here who work their way around the volunteer fire departments but that's about it.

I can only think of a handful of times in 6 years where I thought a woman may have been flirting with me but I didn't go along with it, even when single. Like the others have said if he isn't a cheater the badge bunnies won't have much of an effect.

I can only think of a handful of times in 6 years where I thought a woman may have been flirting with me and I didn't go along with it, even when single.

Did you want to re-word that sentence before Path does an English Comp tap dance on your head?

Did you want to re-word that sentence before Path does an English Comp tap dance on your head?

In my "city" or "beach town" there are tons of badge bunnies. Back when I was younger I actually AVOIDED certain areas and clubs etc. But now that I am old and less desirable I don't see much of it.

It never was a issue of "temptation", never cheated and never will. I just avoided the areas because (A) I did not want anyone at work "assuming" anything and valued my job and morality/integrity and (B) I didnt want my wife to hear about "drunk college" girls "all over" her husband etc.!

Did you want to re-word that sentence before Path does an English Comp tap dance on your head?

Can't rep that but it should. Since he won't get it before he has to put pants on, sentence should start with "when I was single", not end with it.

/Unless he was comparing his experiences with men flirting with him, and then I can't help him.
//Unless he is saying it is ment that came on to him and the I can't help him at all. You can't be trolling in the water and not attact the sharks.

Did you want to re-word that sentence before Path does an English Comp tap dance on your head?

She'll be more mad I called myself ugly than anything...

Maybe it's because I work for small towns or maybe it's because I'm ugly, but I don't find there is a high amount of badge bunnies in general around here. There are alot of "firehouse whores" here who work their way around the volunteer fire departments but that's about it.

I can only think of a handful of times in 6 years where I thought a woman may have been flirting with me and I didn't go along with it, even when single. Like the others have said if he isn't a cheater the badge bunnies won't have much of an effect.

Does it count if you're being flirted with off-duty, but the person knows you're a cop? If so, then I may have witnessed you being flirted with by a badge bunny. :P



Oh, and you're right about me being mad over the "ugly" comment...Gregory.

Where are the badge bunnies? I've been looking for them for years and never can find any! Maybe I'm homely like Gregory. :bigear:

Oh, and you're right about me being mad over the "ugly" comment...Gregory.

Rut roh, this is serious, she referred to you as Gregory! LOL

Can't rep that but it should. Since he won't get it before he has to put pants on, sentence should start with "when I was single", not end with it.

/Unless he was comparing his experiences with men flirting with him, and then I can't help him.
//Unless he is saying it is ment that came on to him and the I can't help him at all. You can't be trolling in the water and not attact the sharks.

Actually, the way I read it, was that there was only a handful of times Greg did NOT go along with it. Of course, maybe that's what he really meant to say?

Where are the badge bunnies? I've been looking for them for years and never can find any! Maybe I'm homely like Gregory. :bigear:

At least we have a good personality.


Rut roh, this is serious, she referred to you as Gregory! LOL

Yep, add the middle name and I'll get flasbacks of my childhood.


Actually, the way I read it, was that there was only a handful of times Greg did NOT go along with it. Of course, maybe that's what he really meant to say?

Oopsie, I edited it :)

Actually, the way I read it, was that there was only a handful of times Greg did NOT go along with it. Of course, maybe that's what he really meant to say?

Oh yes, that's even better.

Where are the badge bunnies? I've been looking for them for years and never can find any! Maybe I'm homely like Gregory. :bigear:

Greg's a badge squirrel if that helps.

Actually, the way I read it, was that there was only a handful of times Greg did NOT go along with it. Of course, maybe that's what he really meant to say?

If that's the case, I just don't want to hear the stories. Lol.

Pathos is a holster sniffer.

Pathos is a holster sniffer.

Only for you, dear.

Congratulations to your boyfriend. Its great that he accomplished the goal of securing a career in law enforcement. Hats off to him!

The job does change people. Consequently, your relationship will change. It may change for the better or it may change for the worse. All you can do is be prepared for the change in him that will come. The changes will be suttle but they will occur. Changes in a new police officer are not necessarily bad or good; but they come with the job.

As far as your relationship goes, it sounds strong. You don't know if he has cheated on you before. Only he knows that. Your willingness to give him the benefit of the doubt is a testament to how strong your relationship is. What I would suggest is to let nature take its course. If you two are meant to be together you will be together regardless of his occupation. You love him and he loves you. No one can come between the two of you unless one of you is a willing party.

You sound like a great girlfriend that will stand by his side as he embarks on this exciting new career. I would strongly suggest not nagging him about things that he cannot control(i.e., late arrests, mandatory overtime, rotating schedule). The last thing he needs while he is under the intense pressure of field training is to come home to someone giving him a hard time. Support, love and understand him even when its hard too.

Good luck!